Saturday, June 8, 2013

This is Where I Needed to Start!


This is where I needed to start!


     One day, at a time when I was struggling with the effects of ADD (low self-esteem, and so on), a person from my church mentioned to me about attending "Eucharistic Adoration".   "What's that?"  I asked.  I mean, sure I went to church most Sundays, received communion, maybe had gone to confession once a year, and helped out with church carnivals and dinners.  What more was there?  We didn't have Eucharistic Adoration at our church.  "It's going before our Lord, in His Hidden Presence  in the Holy Eucharist, that's put in an elaborate vessel called a Monstrance."  She continued.  "You can pray, read Scripture, ask for guidance, or just sit and keep our Lord company."  She smiled at me and gave me a sheet of paper that had the times of the different churches that hosted this centuries old tradition (unawares to me).  I must admit it was appealing!
     My first experience of attending Eucharistic Adoration was nothing special, or so I thought.  I went in, walked up the main isle, and chose a pew in the middle.  I usually sat in the wing, but I was curious.  Noticing another person saying the rosary, I realized that I hadn't brought mine.  Did I even know where it was?  But I did bring my little prayer book received at My First Holy Communion. (ironically).  
     The wind was strongly blowing outside and the rafters were creaking and groaning inside.  It was a little erie and uncomfortable for me, although this was my main church growing up. 
     Opening up my little book (probably for the second time) I proceeded to
say the prayers inside, while every now and then glancing at the beautiful 
monstrance.  I remember thinking; now, we are supposed to believe that 
that's really Jesus, I mean, really, really, believe it's His body. I know we are
taught that in catechism, but do all catholics really believe this?  I couldn't get
my mind around this idea.  So I continued to read my prayers.  This went on
for about a half hour, and I started to feel anxious. My mind told me, that this was probably long enough and that I had so many things to do at home.  Was that other person going to think I didn't know what I was doing?  Wait....I don't
know what I'm doing.  Ok Jesus, it's been nice.  I feel relaxed.  See you Sunday, and out I went!
     See I told you it was nothing special.

To be continued...